It’s official — mermaids are not real.
The U.S. government broke the hearts of Ariel fans in a post titled “No Evidence of Aquatic Humanoids Has Ever Been Found” on the the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration’s website. They announced:
The belief in mermaids may have arisen at the very dawn of our species. Magical female figures first appear in cave paintings in the late Paleolithic (Stone Age) period some 30,000 years ago, when modern humans gained dominion over the land and, presumably, began to sail the seas. Half-human creatures, called chimeras, also abound in mythology — in addition to mermaids, there were wise centaurs, wild satyrs, and frightful minotaurs, to name but a few. But are mermaids real? No evidence of aquatic humanoids has ever been found.
Why sink the mermaid myth now? It has to do with an Animal Planet show people took a bit too seriously. “Mermaids: The Body Found,” which aired last month, was a documentary-style program that, according to a press release, “paints a wildly convincing picture of the existence of mermaids, what they may look like, and why they’ve stayed hidden…until now.”
The verdict is still out on unicorns, gryphons and manic pixie dream girls.
Follow @JamesAquilone on Twitter. Follow @WeirdTales on Twitter.
(image by Daniela Uhlig)